Friday, July 06, 2007

Questions and Answers

Johnny Nash is a singer of my youth. Using Bob Marley’s backing band, The Wailers, he gave me infectious reggae melodies that brought some style to my walk. Two of his songs describe my life over the past two weeks.

I have been in the mountains seeking God. I learned from a Buddhist teacher how to sit, and how to breathe, and how to be still. I spend two periods of five days each in silence, with a guided reflection in between the two times of silence. I became aware that my mind seeks distraction so that I can avoid facing the real issues deep inside of me. I found both challenge, and refuge in the silence. I have become quieter and my head has less buzz and chatter.

I am also aware that contemplating God is a bit like the flea describing an elephant. Somewhat brashly I thought that this could be a time of encounter with God and that I could come down from the mountain with clarity. This has proved to be illusive – hence the Johnny Nash song:

There are more questions than answers
Pictures in my mind that will not show
There are more questions than answers
And the more I find out the less I know
Yeah, the more I find out the less I know…..

I do not have answers for all my questions. In fact I have discovered some new questions. There is no shadow of doubt in my mind that God loves me. And that God is to be found wherever I struggle for justice, and work to alleviate human suffering. I do not have the answers for why people suffer, or why we seem to struggle with life, or why George Bush claims to have God on his side.

But at the same time my Creator encountered me. I sat in silence on a snow covered mountain and God came in search of me. I had glimpses of a Call on my life re-affirmed. And I knew moments of absolute trust in God. Above all I return to life convinced that following Jesus is the only way for me to live an authentic life.

Hence the second Johnny Nash song:
I can see clearly now, the rain is gone
I can see all obstacles in my way
Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun shiny day

I think I can make it now, the pain is gone
All of the bad feelings have disappeared
Here is the rainbow I've been prayin' for
It's gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright)
Sun shiny day


Wessel Bentley said...

Welcome back. It's good to hear you again.

rebecca said...

It is amazing how being still you can reach clarity.


Jenny Hillebrand said...

That's encouraging. Thank you.

Mev Dominee said...

Welcome back. We missed you.

I wish I lived closer to you ,so I could invite myself for coffee and just come to learn from you.

I will continue to pray for you and your family.

pray for mine.

PS: the best Rendition I ever heard of 'I can see clearly now' was by a band called 'hothouse flowers'.