Thursday, August 09, 2007

Sex in the Abbey Garden

Sue Culver is a deacon in the Methodist Church in York. And was worried about Dora, whose hormones were working overtime in just plain sexual frustration. So after some thought Sue decided to take Dora to Reivaux Abbey. Sue also took the rest of the family – including Me and my daughter Jessica.


The Abbey is out in the country, along a typical twisty, winding English country road (the English used horses to design their roads). Dorah was very excited about this visit, and when we arrived at the Abbey we were relieved to see how Dorah was the first out of the car. Sue had pre-arranged to meet Sam at 7pm. So there we were in the shadow of the Abbey, as Dora and Sam made their introductions.

They were both very inexperienced at this sort of stuff. Sue tried offering helpful hints. Sue’s husband John then lent a hand. And the rest of us offered prayers for a successful union as they eyed each other. Dora made the first move, much to Sam’s bewilderment. Dora had him in a clinch, which made the rest of us giggle with disbelief. So Sue and John got had to show them how it was done. John later confessed to “not knowing enough of this stuff”.

Finally it was decided that they were acquainted sufficiently to spend the night together. So we will fetch Dora tonight. And hopefully in 63 days there will be some Patterdale Terrier puppys. For lessons, or puppies, contact Sue at susan.culver@btopenworld.com

4 comments:

Sylvia said...

How Rude! And you members of the church. Quite shocking! (I've got a mad cocker spaniel by the way so no takers here. Love to all.
Sylvia

Emily Oliver said...

Pete, we look forward to seeing you soon in Cape Town in just a few days!

Sylvia said...

Pete I think we've been really priviledged to have you in our company. You are obviously very much loved and missed at home. Thanks to all your people for letting you come here. With love in Jesus

dinsy said...

Pete, thanks for the posts and pictures from Yorkshire over the last few weeks (land of my birth). Just one comment on this post, it wasn't horses that the english used, it was drunkards. Have you not come across GK Chesterton's "The Rolling English Road"? Link here if I've got the html right. It's worth a read.